The Plowboy and the Moose

I managed to survive freshman year but it was touch and go right up to the last minute. One day near the end of the year I had left school in something of a fog. Somehow, I had left a book behind and I needed that book so I went back to the schoolhouse to get it. I thought I had probably left it in Mrs. Jones typing room. Mrs. Jones was coach Salty Jones's wife, typing teacher and cheerleader's guru. Those cheerleaders were the absolute cream of the Roscoe crop of girls. Being a devastatingly beautiful girl in Roscoe insured that girl of two things. One she got to be a Plowboy Cheerleader and the other was a job at Haney's Drug Store. Generally the cheerleaders were made up of Seniors and Juniors. The number of open spaces available on the cheerleading team depended on how many of them had graduated the year previous. The 1957-58 crop was prime indeed. That being said, back to the book hunt. I was sure that book was in the typing room and that's where I went to look. I noticed that the door to the room was pulled shut but not closed completely. That was unusual since Mrs. Jones always left her door widely opened all the time, except during cheerleader meetings and such. I never gave that anything other than passing thought. Just reached out, pulled the door open and stuck my head in. Damn near had a heart attack. There in the back of the room, with her back to me was one of the cheerleaders. Just which one, I fear to say, but for literary purposes, let's give her a name. Hmmm, let's see, pick a name, ahha, how about Alice. Alice was in the very middle of changing clothes. In fact, she was plumb naked. That just scared me to death. I left that schoolhouse as quickly and quietly as I possible could, praying with all my heart and soul that she didn't see me. I ran the long way around the school to the little white store just across the street. Behind that store, I fell back against the wall. My heart was slamming in my chest. My knees were weak and trembling. My hand